Cut and Run (1985)

After finding the bloody remains of the subjects of their story on drug smuggling, Miami reporter Fran Hudson (Lisa Blount) and cameraman Mark Ludman (Leonard Mann) discover evidence connecting the massacre and other drug-related activities to Colonel Brian Horne (Richard Lynch), a war criminal and former associate of Jim Jones long thought dead. It further appears that their boss's (Richard Bright) son, Tommy (Willie Aames), is somehow mixed up in Horne's drug operation. They head down to South America to see what else they can uncover, but upon arriving they have to contend with Horne's army of native acolytes and fearsome assassin Quecho (Michael Berryman).

If that plot summary makes any sense to you, I've done a better job than I imagined I could of making this extremely confusing story seem halfway coherent. Still, if you watch this movie it's not because you're expecting an ironclad narrative, but because you want to see the violent rapes, brutal murders, wanton torture, abundant nudity, ghastly death scenes, and exquisite location photography with which director Ruggero Deodato tends to fill his films, and if that's the case Cut and Run probably won't disappoint. Women are stripped naked, thrown to the ground, held in spread eagle position by daggers that have been thrust through their legs, gang raped as they lie there like frogs pinned to dissection tables, and then decapitated. One guy learns what it's like to be a Thanksgiving wishbone when he's placed in a contraption that pulls the ropes that are tied around his ankles in opposite directions, tearing him in half. And there's much, much more!

And if that's not enough to make you want to place this classic at the top of your Netflix queue, or buy the fucker outright, consider this: Willie Aames. Who is Willie Aames, you ask? Well, let's consult his IMDb biography. Here we go: "[Willie Aames] overcame a painkiller addiction after getting injured playing the Christian superhero 'Bibleman' in a traveling show." Other than that he's one of the very worst actors of his or any generation, that pretty much tells you everything important there is to learn about Willie Aames. In Cut and Run, Aames emotes each and every line with such intensity that you expect him to fall dead from a stroke at any second. He doesn't, though, perhaps because he's wearing his lucky Mickey Mouse shirt through the entire film.

Willie Aames, tons of sex and violence, beautiful scenery, an energetic 80s-ish score; what more could you want in an exploit-action movie? A guy slam dunking an iguana? Well here you go: